A romance

One moment you’re at the top of the stairs heading down to the garage. You’ve got a gig. The first since lockdown. The accordion is already in the trunk of the car.

The next moment, you’ve tumbled down the flight. Your arm is twisted behind you in a way that it’s not meant to. A bone pokes through just below your knee. There’s another hole somewhere, but you can’t see it. The blood from both holes is pooling on top of the indoor-outdoor carpet.

Nice, you think, it’s doing its job.

You hear a noise above you. A slight scraping…


A Matter of Vital Importance

A lot of thought has gone into why this happens. The philosophers and eleven-year-olds may have their clever little joke and regale us with their clever little answer — to get to the other side — which is both trivial and tautological. But as you would expect from tenured academics or children on the cusp of puberty, no thought is given to the practical outcomes of the situation. The much more important question.

What happens when a chicken crosses a road? We’ve been consumed with why the chicken is crossing. But what’s going to happen when she gets there?

So…


How do they sleep at night?


And I wouldn’t hire me either

To whom it may concern,

Thanks so much for inviting me to interview for the Associate’s position with your esteemed firm. To save us all some time, I would like to tell you, in advance, why you are not going to hire me, and why, honestly, I wouldn’t hire myself.

Right off the top, you should know that I am worthless and weak. Of course this is true. According to Doug, we are all worthless and weak. But it shows on me a bit more than others, in my sickly pallor and poor credit rating. I have never added value…


What’s the story? What’s going on?

Five days ago, I read Stef Gijssels’ review of Rob Mazurek’s Dimensional Stardust (International Anthem, 2020) over on the Free Jazz Blog. I went over to Spotify, and then to Bandcamp (where you can listen for free) and then bought it at Bandcamp (because that’s what you do when you love a musician’s work). I’ve listened to it more than a dozen times since then, and I’m listening to it right now, and I think I’m only going to stop when someone shows up and objects. I can’t remember the last time an out-of-the-blue chunk of music has captured me…


And it’s a dump

I decided to move beyond the usual 10% of my brain after watching Morgan Freeman’s infomercial on Friday night, and phoning in my $19.95. I wasn’t entirely pleased with the results, I have to say. Some of it was cool. For example:

  • I memorized the value of pi (π) all the way down to twelve decimal places without a calculator.
  • I made it three days and only once confused to, two, or too.
  • I could feel — really feel — the genuine human pathos underlying the struggles of these majestic humans who are contestants on the Great British Baking Show.


None should be as small as me

I wish that I were not so small
Mysteriously free
Over looking under toes
None should be as small as me
None should be as small as me

None should be as tall as trees
Trembling like two lovers
Counting five four two one three
The monster sees right through the covers
The monster sees right through the covers

Monsters fear the naming of her
Strewn upon the dew
Counting five four three one two
I’m so small and so are you
I’m so small and so are you

I’m so small and shed of you A small place we…

Gary Chapin

I write. I have always written. I write about education and other things. I play accordion. I have an extraordinary ability to be fascinated by things.

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